nonsensical words and images

couriernew @ 2007-04-24T21:47:00

2007-04-25T01:48:03Z

couriernew @ 2007-02-17T13:36:00

2007-02-17T18:38:18Z

Jona Bechtolt, douche member of the Blow, calls NBC's 30 Rock "not really funny," but says Tina Fey is "really radical."

Pitchfork

RIP Anna Nicole :(

2007-02-09T19:10:06Z

Thank God it wasn't Jenny McCarthy, Ex-Playmate.

Haha. She cracks me up. I love metal detectors!

couriernew @ 2006-09-26T15:19:00

2006-09-26T19:21:14Z

charles bukowski is, like, the worst poet ever.

couriernew @ 2006-08-27T22:31:00

2006-08-28T02:31:58Z

couriernew @ 2006-07-29T00:22:00

2006-07-29T04:27:38Z

couriernew @ 2006-07-28T23:31:00

2006-07-29T03:31:22Z

morrissey has a receding hairline. i can't have his pomp.

couriernew @ 2006-07-28T23:27:00

2006-07-29T03:26:53Z

i'm a better songwriter than david koresh.

couriernew @ 2006-07-21T00:42:00

2006-07-21T04:43:20Z

i've got more charisma than david koresh

couriernew @ 2006-06-07T19:30:00

2006-06-07T23:31:16Z

i think my hair should look like morrissey's circa this:

yes?

couriernew @ 2006-02-09T22:36:00

2006-02-10T03:37:24Z

everything has a wikipedia entry. if it doesn't, it doesn't exist.

top 10 traits/characteristics/behaviors of big foot/sasquatch/giant apes of 2005

2006-01-03T04:11:14Z

1. muscular build
2. human-like face
3. shyness
4. fear of humans
5. nocturnal habits
6. screaming
7. rock-throwing
8. foul smell
9. musty smell
10. musky smell

couriernew @ 2005-12-30T21:36:00

2005-12-31T02:37:04Z

i think we should have a movie club, sorta like a book club. since i only started watching movies like 5 years ago, i've hardly seen any...and need to. thanks.

couriernew @ 2005-12-20T00:42:00

2005-12-20T05:44:03Z

i need to see the movie garden state again. i'm going to study it because it is so shittily mediocre and yet generally embraced enough that it must have made a pretty penny and certainly earned zach braff more than his fair share of fame. i'm sure my movie can be at least as good.

this is for molly, because she doesn't answer her new phone, but i love her voicemail message

2005-12-06T17:36:57Z

Guess what Ms. Miranda and everybody my last front tooth fell out! I have no teeth in front on top or bottom ahahhahaha can you believe it!!!???? I got $10 for this tooth and $20 for the other tooth!

So Ms. Miranda how is San Francisco are you still there? Did you go across the Golden Gate Bridge??!!! I can't believe you remembered I saw a rainbow when I went across it, you have a really good brain. I was glad that my Mom and Dad took me there to have my birthday when I turned 5. It seemed like the bridge was short when we drove across it, but when I stood on the dirt road beside it and took pictures it seemed like it was really super long. I was so excited about going to that city, I really liked it there. I am learning in school how to make rhyming poems, so I made a poem about San Francisco...

San Francisco has bees

that fly around the pretty trees

There's bumpy windy roads

and magic holes with silly toads

I really liked Alcatraz

and I heard a lot of blues and jazz

The cable cars are really cool

If you don't like them you are a fool

I went there when I was 5 now I am 7

San Francisco the city is heaven!

My mom laughed so hard at the toad part! Ms. Miranda do you like seeing all these cities? Is there a lot of good foods? Do you know what my favorite food is.. uhhhhhhhhhmm...ah yi yihhh..

BBQ Chicken, but I can't eat a drumstick right now because I have no teeth ahahahhaha! Oh and guess what after this month I have 1 more month of school I am so happy. Oh and this Sunday is Mothers Day and I am making a surprise for my mom in class... are you making anything for your Mom? I think everyone should make something for their Moms. hehehe my dog Scruffy is snoring so loud I can't concentrate hehe, so I guess that is it. Ohh but 1 more really quick thing... my Dad just called and told my Mom some friends of his saw the movie at the mall where we used to go shopping it's called Northbrook Mall, isn't that so exciting? Well I hope I see you soon.

143 Brandon

Oh well, if ya didn't know 143 means I Love You but just a secret way to say it. I learned that from Mr. Rogers but he is dead now.

i swear, they were selling these at walmart!

2005-11-25T17:29:28Z

i need to get myself to fairhaven

couriernew @ 2005-11-10T12:48:00

2005-11-10T17:49:48Z

I will update about anything, anytime. ANYTHING, anytime. Show me a thing, I will update about that thing. I swear to god above, if there is something to update about, I will not hesitate. I will leap to my computer, and hit update, to let you know about that topic right now, without even thinking twice. I won't even think once. I will type as I think the thing the first time, and update about it, and then let my eyes travel over the words or images once it is posted, as if reading about the topic for the first time.

couriernew @ 2005-11-03T18:24:00

2005-11-03T23:22:49Z

i'm so over art.

ATTN: kendra plumley

2005-10-27T03:30:40Z

this message is for kendra. hey kendra! i haven't seen or talked to you in awhile! what have you been up to lately? i miss you! we need to get together soon.

would you like to buy this:

from me for $3.20? it's a mixman dm^2 digital music mixer. i bought it at savers for $3.20... and it's not compatible with my mac. you are the only person i know who still uses a windows computer and loves music. i don't really know what it does but it seems cool. it's very you. this is a limited time one time only offer. i need my $3.20 back. if you don't want it i will sell it on ebay. i'm just offering it to you first since you are my friend.

i don't have the instruction manual or the software though! so you'll have to figure out how to use it and a way to get the software for it. i don't even know if it works since i haven't been able to try it. but a child can use it!

there will be no more poetry

2005-10-14T15:37:50Z

i'm writing a novel. i was going to tell you what it's about, now that i've finally figured it out, but i don't want anyone to steal my idea and do a better job. also, i was going to ask for help or advice, but i don't want people expecting to see their names on the acknowledgements, or worse, dedication page.

it's not about:
a man with a jockstrap fetish
patty hearst
a travelling petting zoo
jews
someone who invented something
selling organs on ebay
the man i saw pulling up weeds outside of the dunkin' donuts
the lair of the white worm

it might be about:
charles manson
attleboro, massachusetts
loneliness
lawyers and communists
a kangaroo who works in a travelling petting zoo
trying to live inside spaceship moon
hitler and black magic
the truth about what really happened
the end of the beat generation (the start of something new)

i wish it was:
geek love (minus the large amount of suspension of disbelief required. i mean c'mon. no one can make things move with their mind.)

couriernew @ 2005-10-08T19:34:00

2005-10-08T23:35:44Z

it is a little-known fact that rhode island is quickly becoming a hotbed for giant pumpkins

both, comfort, eyes, for, forth, magic, much, one, restaurant, sex, sink, somehow

2005-10-01T02:35:25Z

The Infinitesimal Caress

It is difficult to tell, after the fact, whether the sex
was consensual or not. After the fact, they can’t tell much.
Two women are dead, mutilated, yet, delicately so. Their eyes
plucked out, their throats slit, their skin drained to a pale white. Both
bodies were dumped in alleys. Cities are paved so that nothing will sink
into the ground, no matter how heavy. One witness has come forth;
the first victim was last seen hailing a cab outside a restaurant
not far from her body. The second victim remains unidentified. The magic
of the city is also its terror—and its shame. There is no comfort
for the living few. Perhaps the dead are lucky, cured somehow
of the inconsolable fear and the constant wonder at which one
of us will be the next brushed off by the infinitesimal caress we live for.

couriernew @ 2005-09-28T21:31:00

2005-09-29T01:33:16Z

ew. the new/released version of fiona apple's extraordinary machine absolutely sucks which is so sad because the jon brion version was a masterpiece. i wish they'd release the finished jon brion version as well so i don't have to listen to shitty unmastered mp3s for the rest of my life.

i'm so not even buying the album now, even though i had intended to. i'll hold out 'til she/they smarten up.

question(s)

2005-09-28T03:02:30Z

why is the bible divided into columns? is it easier to read? then why aren't all books this way? xo

couriernew @ 2005-09-26T08:43:00

2005-09-26T15:45:57Z

so i'm in the library doing research for the charles manson CD listening party kendra and i are having and ALL of the books regarding charles manson are MYSTERIOUSLY MISSING. the database says they are not checked out and yet NONE of them are on the shelf. I KNOW HOW TO USE A LIBRARY.